Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Back to Work.

IS NOT FUN! I have been dreading today since Monday, but also my entire life. Yes, I've been "back to work" since Reilly was born, but.. on my own schedule, come and go as I please, and like..9 hours a week. That was the life! But I ended that life in March because it was just.. not what I thought it would be. I signed a on with a different group doing the same job.. and am still signed on with them, but.. they are proving to be brain dead so I'm moving on without them, and when they get it together, we'll see.. anyway, as for now I'm back at My Left Foot Children's Therapy, where I was right before I got pregnant with Reilly! It's weird.

As I was saying.. I have been dreading this day. Reilly is my best friend in the entire universe, I love love love spending every minute of the day with him! And I love love love that he loves spending every minute of the day with me, and doesn't like when other people try to hold him, and clings to me, and follows me everywhere because I know it won't last forever, and I just live for that feeling of being the most important person in the world to him! It's honestly the greatest feeling in the world. So for me, going back to work, yeah.. I'll miss him, but the thought of him missing me is what tears me to pieces. Today was the first day and I only cried as I was walking to the car after dropping him off at my mom's house, he did fine though, he gave me a kiss and waved as I left looking slightly confused. He didn't cry at all during the day, during lunch I called him and he kissed the phone and laid his head on it while I was talking to him, and then when I picked him up he took 4 STEPS just to get to me!! We came home and took our a bath together (yes.. I wear a bathing suit..) and then played. Jeff got home and asked when his bedtime was, and.. I decided I don't like bedtime anymore.. I want to soak up every second that he is pleasant and awake. Jeff vetoed that one real quick! So today was easy.. tomorrow though I just want to avoid. I'm crossing my fingers when I leave he is excited to play with his Grandma and Uncle Keith, probably not Aunt Karen though, and doesn't cry because now he knows that when I leave I don't come back for a while. Hoping he does great again! We shall see!!

I am too neurotic though. MY MOM is watching him, the woman who raised me, and three of my siblings.. clearly she is perfectly capable, at least she did a fabulous job with me! Yet I still feel the need to pack his breakfast, lunch, and snack.. with directions and a meal plan. Hoping that doesn't last as well.. I'm just so picky about his fruit and vegetable combinations and it's not natural. Working on letting go.. I really need to work on that one. The other night Jeff went to the grocery store to pick up a few items and I couldn't sleep because I wondered if he checked the recipe on the chicken nuggets to make sure they weren't battered with eggs. Alas.. I checked the recipe first thing in the morning, they were fine. But these are all firsts for me, I'm sure baby #2 will roll around in the dirt and eat.. bugs for lunch.

OH.. and he was cracking me up tonight when we were playing. That kid.. I don't know where he gets it from, he is a nut! He has this new angry face he makes.. where he tilts his head down, gives you a mean stare and pinches his lips together for a few seconds, then cracks up! It kills me every time! And then he was picking up my phone, holding it up like he was going to take a picture, and saying "cheese". I just love every little inch of him!

Anyway.. I guess that's it for now, too exhausted to upload pictures, I'll try to get that angry face one, it's just too great!


Post a Comment